Four Noble Truths
This poignant ninety minute teaching encouraged me to re-evaluate. While sitting there listening to him speak, my brain started to take stock of the suffering that I've been experiencing and its connection to attachment. Much of my quiet time recently has been spent contemplating the many ways that the loss of the objects of my attachment has led to and will bring about suffering, pain, and discontent. According to Rinpoche, we often fall into the trap of attachment: people, relationships, money, status, brands, food, drugs, alcohol, and even life.
While working at Vajra Varahi Clinic I've encountered attachment in many different forms. Too often I find that my patients are attached to their pain. It takes large leaps of faith to allow a foreigner to place his hands on you to take something away that you have learned to live with for so long; even something as unwanted as physical pain can become an object of personal identity and attachment. I'm learning that in order to help my patients I must first view each one as a person rather than a case of muscular dysfunction or a patient. Only when I see them as people can I try to treat them with compassion and understanding. Only when a person feels that my intentions are rooted in compassion and that my ego is not driving my methodology will they trust me and try to let go.
The suffering that I've been facing lately has been a little different. Since my arrival I've made strong connections and friendships with the people whith whom I have lived and worked. In the past recent weeks Joel, Lee, Mac, Dayna, and Marcela have left the clinic to pursue their careers, studies, and lives. Each one of them has had a profound impact upon my professional or personal life; quickly growing attached to their compassionate and giving hearts. The terrible thing about those attachments is waking up in the morning and facing the reality that these beautiful people are gone. The suffering I feel, however, is not a result of the relationships, but rather a result of my attachment to those relationships. My hope that those relationships would not end is the source of that pain. It would be easy for me to avoid that pain by not opening myself to new relationships and experiences, but then we all would miss out on the wonderful exchange of each others talents and graces.
Next week I'll be leaving the Kathmandu Valley and this wonderful clinic to continue my work in Namobuddha. By moving on I'll be leaving behind not only many regular patients, but also the interpreters and monks who I count as my friends and teachers. Satyamohan, Prajwal, Ritesh, Tsering, and Manisha have taught me so much while working with them. We have always been quick to remind each other to let go of our own egos; almost always with a smile and a laugh. The past few weeks I've also been working with a brilliant young monk, Ratna Mangalam. Together we've work on his English writing and in return he has given me friendship and shared tons of knowledge about the Three Jewels. There have been many other monks that have graciously accepted me as a friend and have shared their lives with me. My friends Dudhul and Sangay have been a daily source of joy and laughter. These wonderful young men and women have given me much to cherish and many reasons for attachment.
This has been a difficult lesson for me to learn, but one that continues to slap me harshly in the face. All that I experience now may be gone tomorrow. Every relationship, regardless of how insignificant or profound, sooner or later will end. All that I have will eventually disappear. These have been humbling realities for my ego to face, but ones that I’m glad that I must resolve. Rather than fostering nihilistic feelings of what’s the point, they've made my life and practice all the more special. Armed with the knowledge that tomorrow will be different, what choice do I have but to live today with love, compassion, and kindness? Knowing that the person with whom I build a relationship today may be gone tomorrow, what choice do I have but to love that person honestly and genuinely while cherishing and growing every minute? Knowing that I am leaving in a week, what choice do I have but to treat each patient that comes to me with all the knowledge I’ve been entrusted and all the metta within my heart?
1. Suffering Exists
2. The Cause of Suffering Can Be Realized
3. Cessation of Suffering Can Be Achieved
4. Following The Path Ends Suffering
This is the foundation of the Dharma. Regardless of which school or teaching of Buddhism one follows: Theravada, Mahayana, Vajrayana, etc. the path is paved by the same stones – The Four Noble Truths.
While in Nepal I have had several different teachers and many different lessons. Some of the teachers, as the lessons, have been kind and compassionate while others have been harsh and blunt. Either way, it has been hard not to allow these teachers and my lessons to have a profound impact upon my personal, professional, and spiritual lives.
Last Saturday I travelled to the White Gompa in Boudha to hear a public teaching given by Chӧkyi Nyima Rinpoche. The Dharma he shared, entitled Common Sense, was presented in an insightful and personally relevant manner. During his teaching Rinpoche focused on the common sense of how attachment brings about suffering (suffering also includes discontent). The more we have, the more we possess, the more we cling - the more we suffer. The more I have, the more I think, the more I cling – ahhh, the more I suffer.
This poignant ninety minute teaching encouraged me to re-evaluate. While sitting there listening to him speak, my brain started to take stock of the suffering that I've been experiencing and its connection to attachment. Much of my quiet time recently has been spent contemplating the many ways that the loss of the objects of my attachment has led to and will bring about suffering, pain, and discontent. According to Rinpoche, we often fall into the trap of attachment: people, relationships, money, status, brands, food, drugs, alcohol, and even life.
While working at Vajra Varahi Clinic I've encountered attachment in many different forms. Too often I find that my patients are attached to their pain. It takes large leaps of faith to allow a foreigner to place his hands on you to take something away that you have learned to live with for so long; even something as unwanted as physical pain can become an object of personal identity and attachment. I'm learning that in order to help my patients I must first view each one as a person rather than a case of muscular dysfunction or a patient. Only when I see them as people can I try to treat them with compassion and understanding. Only when a person feels that my intentions are rooted in compassion and that my ego is not driving my methodology will they trust me and try to let go.
My attachment to "I" has been a constant struggle. The pain of letting go of my personal and professional relationships to come here was difficult, but it was a sacrifice I needed to make. It was also made with the understanding, at that time, that in a few short months I will return and pick-up where I left off. Since coming here I've learned that life does not wait for anyone. There is no pause button – change is constant. It was my attachment to ego that made me feel that things don’t change unless you want them to. Life and the universe, however, constantly change. My belief that I can avoid change is as big of a mistake as a belief that this experience has not changed my life.
The suffering that I've been facing lately has been a little different. Since my arrival I've made strong connections and friendships with the people whith whom I have lived and worked. In the past recent weeks Joel, Lee, Mac, Dayna, and Marcela have left the clinic to pursue their careers, studies, and lives. Each one of them has had a profound impact upon my professional or personal life; quickly growing attached to their compassionate and giving hearts. The terrible thing about those attachments is waking up in the morning and facing the reality that these beautiful people are gone. The suffering I feel, however, is not a result of the relationships, but rather a result of my attachment to those relationships. My hope that those relationships would not end is the source of that pain. It would be easy for me to avoid that pain by not opening myself to new relationships and experiences, but then we all would miss out on the wonderful exchange of each others talents and graces.
Next week I'll be leaving the Kathmandu Valley and this wonderful clinic to continue my work in Namobuddha. By moving on I'll be leaving behind not only many regular patients, but also the interpreters and monks who I count as my friends and teachers. Satyamohan, Prajwal, Ritesh, Tsering, and Manisha have taught me so much while working with them. We have always been quick to remind each other to let go of our own egos; almost always with a smile and a laugh. The past few weeks I've also been working with a brilliant young monk, Ratna Mangalam. Together we've work on his English writing and in return he has given me friendship and shared tons of knowledge about the Three Jewels. There have been many other monks that have graciously accepted me as a friend and have shared their lives with me. My friends Dudhul and Sangay have been a daily source of joy and laughter. These wonderful young men and women have given me much to cherish and many reasons for attachment. Ahhh, there's the rub – exactly what Rinpoche was talking about. Next week I'll be living in my fifth “home” within a year. My homes and possessions I rarely think about, but the people with whom I've grown attached I miss terribly. Those attachments are the source of my suffering. Each person that has been my friend, my teacher, my family member, my partner has affected me in a way that has taught me to seek out and practice compassion and loving-kindness within my work and my life. So, how can that possibly bring suffering? It’s the attachment. Through attachment I have neglected one powerful law of the universe, impermanence; everything must someday end - hmm, even me.
This has been a difficult lesson for me to learn, but one that continues to slap me harshly in the face. All that I experience now may be gone tomorrow. Every relationship, regardless of how insignificant or profound, sooner or later will end. All that I have will eventually disappear. These have been humbling realities for my ego to face, but ones that I’m glad that I must resolve. Rather than fostering nihilistic feelings of what’s the point, they've made my life and practice all the more special. Armed with the knowledge that tomorrow will be different, what choice do I have but to live today with love, compassion, and kindness? Knowing that the person with whom I build a relationship today may be gone tomorrow, what choice do I have but to love that person honestly and genuinely while cherishing and growing every minute? Knowing that I am leaving in a week, what choice do I have but to treat each patient that comes to me with all the knowledge I’ve been entrusted and all the metta within my heart?I’m far far away from renouncing all forms of attachment. This will be a life-long lesson that'll be marked by daily struggles with discontent, pain, and suffering. My experiences and relationships since I have been here have shown me that the love I can give and receive today, the compassion that has been shared with me and I share today, and the kindness that has been shown to me and that I express today are much more powerful and meaningful if today I let go and live with an open and free heart.
NAMASTE!!!
